Back to emo life i guess..

Woah..
Time really passes by so fast.
It does flies whether you're having fun or not.
But it still continue ticking.
So i guess my time's running out for all those post-O-Level activities because next week school's gonna start for me and many others though.

However it only applies to those who particapated in PAE 07 which is jc/mi trials for the first few weeks based on our own sec sch prelim results.
So i was posted to M.I. which is the only school i can go to because of L1R5 > 20 as you all already know i supposed.

I thought our holidays would be much more longer just like how it feels straightly right after O-Levels.
However it's so different now.
That time we were like man, cant wait for results and going back to school.
Now it's like the same normal old thought of i don't want school to start that soon though this time round there's no homework to think about.

HAHA.
OK.

So yeah.
Here's a quick review of my intended activities UN-DONE!

First of all i still yet have soccer training, matches and playing street soccer and stuffs with my fellow ashburtonians.(& close friends/relatives)

Secondly I've yet to get new shoes for my post-secondary education.
Oh and there's still alot to prepare such as sec school uniform for PAE, then bags, pencil case, wallet, specs, socks, belt, and other school stuffs.

Thirdly I've got a chalet to attend to still,(though i haven't attend any this hols.)
Syariff is having a family and close friends and relatives chalet this coming Friday to Monday.(28-31 DEC 07)
So yeah he invited me at least to the Escape theme park and chalet soccer and chalet cycling or something.

HAHA.

Oh and yes speaking of cycling, i have yet to go around this island, mainly the east-side(punggol, sengkang, hougang, bedok, tampines, pasir ris, east cost) with my friends which are haikal, syariff, hafiz and anyone else who are interested to tag along.

I do still owe haikal a guitar lesson together as in come to his "recording studio" house and play together especially the strumming and chords part.
HAHA.
How i wish i had already form a band but we havent even go jamming together yet.
I suggested for PASSIONATE POISON for our band name comprising me, haikal, charles and shafie. Sub members are khabir, izhaq, zairil, ammar.
But this dream of mine didnt turn out really quite well though as we are all not prepared and there are so many things going on such as misunderstanding among friends and not even know how or which instruments to play.

Furthermore, i have to go to houses to retrieve back my valuable items such as turf shoes at syariff house, my bro's sneakers at zairil's house and my bag containing laundry items at izhaq's house.

So that's some of the deals.
However there are still other leisure activities which i never experience before such as going to the snow city to touch the "snow" and play with it.
LOLs.
Oh and plans for paintball and go-kart seems to be impossible.
Don't you all think so because of cost, time and venue.
HAHA.

Then there's science center MUMMIES exhibition to go to and discovery center is always nice to drop by if i go to the west side, jurong.
& there is always this syiok jurong east swimming complex to relax and have fun with water.
It's rather cheap there compared to the WildWildWet.
Coz it still have slides and lazy pool and waterfall and sea waves to play around with there at the normal swimming pool rate.
Good deal there.
HAHA.

&& the most important thing is to figure out how am i supposed to go to M.I. for the first few weeks at least.
I'm so gonna try out different bus and/or mrt routes that go to bukit batok ave 8.
Have to find out which way is the fastest so i can reach school early or at least on time.
HAHA.
I don't want sec sch life experience to repeat itself.
Where i always come late and kena detention and duties and stuffs.
Writing down name at the log book and general office and being reprimanded by MRS LIM is not a good thing though is quite fun when you do all those punishment.
HAHAHA.

Oh and how could i forget movies, bowling and shopping spree.

I had just watched red line recently, last Monday on the 24Th Dec 07 with syafiq, syariff, shafie and charles.
Sadly haikal didn't follow and it was rather not that fun though, quite akward for two separate groups, syafiq and syariff on one side and shafie and charles on the other.
I'm like the middle man for them as in i blend quite well in both ways.

HAHA.

Hmm how long i didn't bowl?
Quiet long i guess.
The last time was during O-Level with zairil, haikal and shafie but that wasn't really a great game of bowling.
Just to release some stress while studying together.
Missed those cool and nice bowling alleys such as at SAFRA tampines Cathay bowl.
Missed those good old days hanging out with sabri, zul, azri, hafiz, ariffin and some others there.
We bowl, eat, lepaked and their hiding place for smoking.
But the weird thing is i never joined in to smoke.
Good for me.*Gives myself a pat*
NEVER EVER WILL I DO OK.
=)

& so about shopping, year end sales are here and there are many great discounts.
Unfortunately i don't have that much money to buy stuffs.
Those i want or even those i need.
So i must start shopping or maybe at least window shop for wallet, watch, socks, shoes and other misc items while they come in cheap this festive season of giving.

So ya basically that's the real deal.
Those are my UN-touched plans which i have to accomplish within this 1 week of hols left.
There are actually much more to it. As in many other stuffs to do this hols but it doesn't seem quite right didn't it?

So good luck to all you peeps out there who's taking O-Levels this year and aiming to get into JC or otherwise.
Have fun in your new schools no matter where you get into or which friends are in the same school as you are.
Just try to meet and make more new friends in your new environment later on next year.
I'm telling ya'll this coz that's what I'm hoping for.
Getting to know more new people in M.I. and hopefully i can adapt to the new environment and not stay awkward or whatsoever coz i only know 4 ppl going there for PAE from TKSS.
They are me 4h, johnathan kum 4h, syafiqah(syaq) 4f and syafiqah(eecar) 4k.
Izhaq was posted there too but i supposed he didn't want to go there.
So yeah he's not going for PAE.
How pathetically sad=(
But nevertheless shall be looking forward to it since i have two cousins there.
Fariz and Mutalib.

Oh and did i forget to tell you that today is syafiqah's(eecar) birthday.
So yeah happy 16th birthday to you and sorry if i didn't get you anything.

Last but not least i need to get a haircut real soon though i do not think my hair is that long for school.
But my dad keep pestering me to cut coz he don't like my long fringe and messy undone "medium"not "long' hair.

Goodnight my dear readers if you have been reading this.
Good luck in what ever you do.
All the best.
Merry Christmas to those celebrating them and have a wonderful prosperous year ahead.
Happy 2008 NEW YEAR in advance.
Goodbye.

Empty

After sending my little cousin home and after Friday prayers,
I went to ashburton soccer training.
It was dame syiok as in its quite beneficial as we are improving and putting our best through rain and shine.
Played crosses, set pieces and attack v.s. defence.
And i think the 4-on-4 was the best;)
Me, Syariff, Taufiq, Izhaq, 'Ammar, Haikal, Charles and Shafie were present.
However they all came abit late as usual.
Say 3pm bt end up like 4pm.
So i had to wait for them since i was the earliest to arrive for the first time.
HAHA.
And wow yay!
Izhaq's back in ashburton.

Then today went to watch movie at golden village cinema at vivo city at harbour front for the first time.
HAHA.
Went with my cuz and bro and aunt and her friend, an ITE teacher.
I was invited beacuse my aunt got this free Alvin and the chipmunks movie ticket from some ITE movie outing.
LOL. I know it's what ah..
Should have watched hitman or something right?
But trust me the show's not that kiddy.
It's not that good though for a hit charting movie but quite funny and can be made as an early Christmas movie treat.

Then went off to Plaza Sing to buy string for my bro's acoustic guitar.
Thought they could restring it for us there.
But they don't offer that service.
How could they, as in they have music lessons there and their shop is quite big too for official music stuffs.
But still none of them know how or help us restring the guitar?
Tired of thinking where else can help us restring, we string it back on our own.
And there you go.
My bro's guitar is back in shape with perfect tunings and all.
&& i think i can play your photograph is proof-taking back Sunday; and your guardian angel-red jumpsuit apparatus..
I guess learning and watching my bro play the guitar tend to make me improve a little.
Haha. ask me to play the A, C, D, Em, G chords.
I'm getting there=)

Then watched Asian idol a while and i don't think they rock.
Used comp to check friendster and chat with my psychologist before writing this "empty" post.

& when i grow up, i think i would like to be a the one who studies/masters philosophy.
HAHAHA i bet you all laugh at that thought of mine.=p

Now I'm off to bed.
Good night everybody!:)

MI TITANS!

Yay!
Millennia Institute, here i come..
Woots!
Ima take arts/commerce course.
As in im going to take either geography, economics, management of business, principal of accounts, malay language and literature, mathematics, chemistry.
HAHA.
But im sure ima take up geography and econs.
Bt the other 2 subjs? i don't know yet.
Ok so yeah bye for now.
&&& for those who's going MI for the PAE 08, cya on 2nd jan08 at 8am=)))

The silence in black and white...

My december hols this time round are quieter than before.
The silence in black and white!

You taught my heart!

I think i need to do something about my life or ill stay misery for life!
Hmph.

I'll have lots to list down for this 2008 new year resolution.
From now on I'm so going to focus on study much more than ever.
Studies will come first before everything or anything else.
I don't want to regret later on in life just like how i have regret not studying properly during secondary school life.=(
I must have a daily timetable then.
I must start planning on one, do one and follow one exactly so that i can benefit and occupy my precious time much much more effectively than before.
I won't be wasting any time doing stuffs that doesn't benefit me then.
I must grab hold of life-given opportunities.
I must have an aim or target so that i have something to rely on and a way to lead my life properly.

& i shall not follow people blindly like i had.
I shall listen & trust my own heart more than unreliable sources e.g. unreal friends.
I'll strive to be a better person in the near future and be good guy.
I don't want to be a bad dad later on!

& i think if people leave interests/hobbies for studies, than that's actually quiet good.
But if he/she doesn't take advantage of the free times for excluding their interests/hobbies, than i think it's such a pity.
& for myself, i moved house to a newer and quieter environment which was good for studies.
But sadly again i didn't make full use of it for studying purposes.

Actually the way my parents brought me up and discipline me with strictness were good though.
But as a child, i never agreed with their ways and didn't obey them that much.
Or else i could be a rather successful student as in if i took the time for my studies, character, attitude and behaviour.
&& i guess every child now would have thought the same way as i did too.
BUT they are going too realise it just too late too, i guess.

Should have really cared about my education earlier on so as not to regret like what I'm feeling now!

I didn't know why but didn't ask questions..

I swear that I'm very confused with every single thing in my life.
I'm soo lost that i don't even know; what's really happening, what's gonna happen, what to do, where to go, when it's gonna end, which people who really undesrstands me and to whom to trust, who am i to befriend with, and lastly, where my life gonna take me.
I have lots of doubts in life but i never cleared it.
I didn't know why, but didn't ask questions.
That's lot in life to think for really and i don't know what's right and best for me and other people, how to make the right choice or decision and many other more stuffs.
Man I'm dammed confused with almost everything.
I'm a very confused guy i think.
God please help me and save me from this thoughts i have in my life.
Maybe I'm better off without you.
Maybe i you should leave me alone and don't disturb me.
Maybe i ought to be left alone in this cold world.
Hmm?!..
I still have no real objective in life, i dunno who i really am, what I'm gonna be when i grow up, and what I'm supposed to do every Milli-endless-seconds.
Like there's so much should i or should i not, must i or must i not, could i or could i not, would i or would i not situations.
It's so complicating.
Maybe one night i should just take that night off and rest& relax through long night walks.
Maybe i should think and reflect what i have done right and what i have not in the past.
Maybe i should find solutions for my problems.
Or maybe i should just leave it alone and make it seems like nothing has happened, as in every thing's perfect when it's not though.
Should i worry over it more or should i just let it go and think that it's OK.
How am i to know..
Haiz.
I think i can forgive and forget but the people Ive offended either intentionally or not, can't.
And people always say that i rant alot.
But it couldn't be help.
I can't help it.
If i don't who will understand me and who will help me out?
However when i pour my feelings out too, it seems like nobody cared or no one understands me.
& also none have really helped me out when I'm facing such difficult situations or problems.
Maybe if I'm more emotional and kept everything to myself and not vent it out, everything will be better for others but not for me i guess.
I must change my lousy attitude/behaviour/character because Ive been causing alot of problems and troubles to many people.
Ive been making alot of people to hate me i guess.
And i don't one people to hate me.
I don't like making enemies as it is not very pleasant and i want some peace in my life.
I think I'm quite a troubled kid though many don't think so and even i myself don't think so too.
Because it's not that obvious for most but for some it is.
So please if anybody could help me out, do approach and counsel me then.
Thanks alot.

Clap

Ok this is soo cool.
Graphic icons getting cooler in my opinion.
Its such cool and fun stuff.
How can a picture contains motion like some video when it's oni a picture still.
HMM

Everybody CLAP!..

Your life and mine...

Oh well i guess everything's soo fast huh?

MCR's concert on 11 dec 07, but sadly i cant go for it..
Nvm I'm not that fanatic about them though but it would be great & nice if I can go..

Then PAE posting results up next week on Thursday, 13 dec 07..

Hmm and then there's Republic Polytechnic open house on 15-17 dec which is sat-monday?.
Cool, make it on weekends huh..
Haha.
Ok im so going to the open house maybe with some friends because we get a chance to get up close with F1, bossaball, cultural performances, course counselling, the Wii experience, abseiling@adventure learning centre and lan gaming competition.

Following after, I heard the N level results would be released on the 17/18 DEC 07.

Wow then there's hari raya haji on 20 DEC 07.
My aunt & uncle have went for haj though yesterday night.
I hope all the best for them in completing their haj and that they will be safe and sound through out their haj.
InsyaAllah.Amin.

Then Christmas season is just around the corner.
Christmas day falls on 25th DEC every year and this means that there will be Christmas sales everywhere from now on till 25th dec.

There'll be more 5 days later..
That's where we countdown to our new year 2008..
We leave the year 2007 with good and receive the year 2008 with good too.
Before 1st January 2008, i must be going crazy doing year-end shopping for necessary stuffs for post sec sch education such as shoes, wallet, clothings and pants.
If im lucky i could upgrade my hand phone to a much newer and better one.

And so, on the 2nd January i would be entering Millennia Institute i guess, hopefully so..
After six weeks of trial there i think we would be getting our O level results on the 21st-25th January 2008 week.
However i saw the JAE 2008 booklet already out in the MOE website.
Maybe our results are really ready to be released any much sooner.
I can just hope and pray for it now as nothing much can be done to save my grades.
We can't turn back time and do something about our papers.
So i hope everything will come out fine don't you all think so.

Hmm with soo much exciting plans ahead i guess there's no more place for boredom in my life at least for this few months.
&& if i cant get any job, i don't mind anymore since there's so much to do now other than getting paid from a hard-earned job.

Life's starting to be great for now on and there's ups and downs in life.
One moment you feel everything's perfectly fine the other you feel that you wanna give up.
Nevertheless i shall be moving on to a better and brighter future which lies ahead of me.
That's all for now.

Sports planet

Hey yo peeps!..
Ive sthg interesting to show to guys too btw..
HAHA.
Its nthg really special though but i was attracted by these two new sports that have yet to hit the craze in Singapore.
Hopefully.

BOSSABALL!



Hmm first up its the bossaball originated from Belgium.
It's a combination of many sports such as volleyball, soccer, sepak takraw, acrobatics and gymnasium.
It's played on a specially designed giant inflatable court with round trampolines and inflatable cushions on both sides of a volleyball net.
Find out more about this new unique fun sport at http://www.bossaball.com/english.html



WATER SOCCER!



Up next is the water soccer which could be find in our own sunny island of Singapore.
Located at jurong west under Fico Sports Hub, you can now play soccer with more varieties to choose from.
You could play the normal full 11-a-side field.
Or just have a mini game of 5-a-side indoor futsal.
What's more there's beach soccer too there at FICO.
And their latest edition i guess must be their cool 7-a-side water soccer!
For more info go here: http://www.ficosport.com/aboutwf.aspx



OK i guess that's all i have for now.
I hope you guys will find this new discoveries interesting too and maybe we could be playing this sports someday yeah..
Haha goodnight and goodbye.

Randomness

Lately Ive been posting stuffs that doesn't really make sense i guess..
Hmm Ive been blogging alot more than usual,
almost everyday,
more on my thoughts, feelings and emotions randomly,
rather than daily events that occurs in my life yeah?..

HAHA.

I must have been over thinking this past few weeks,
mostly after O levels and graduation night..
Those post-sec school period must have been sucky for me..
& im not into favour of zairil and izhaq anymore i guess.
&& so does dilemmas sux!..

HAHA..
OK.

THIS IS JUST ANOTHER RANDOM POST..
Be right back for more random posts...

???

And..
i
dont
get
the
meaning
or
understand
SACHOK,BERG,ANYHOO,OII....

WTH the mats/minahs talking?
Haha some form of weird language i guess.

Blame it on me.

&&& sry ah for any problems/troubles ive caused u..
im falling into my own trap
blame it on me ah..
bt ure to blame too.
it cant be help it and u cant understand it too..
soo were both at loggerheads..
bt its so unintentional n were both provoked by the evil side of ourselves..
Life's giving us HELL!..
I hope heaven will be there to help us out then..
GOD save us from us..

LIAR!

Alamak cant tahan ego ppl ah...
Sikit2 pn mau cari pasal..
Alamak betol ah..
Act lyk sum big fuck when they cant even play properlie.
Irritating lak tu..
Byk buih tapi sumer kosong.
TALK BIG AND LIARS!...
Then say ppl anyhow oni.
Assumers oso tts y i assume back ah..
Sum times terasa lak tu.
HAIZ HAIYO..
Tkder kerje lain ke dorg nk cari psl jer..
Mentang2 dorg tu besar, aku nie kan kecik;
Cari chance ah tu tunjuk belang/step teror lyk macm la dorg tu besar sgt...
Macm phm.
Macm btol jer korg sumer nie.
ALAMAKZ...

I bet u guys gonna say i talk lyk sum mat..
haha ok bt its oni for this post can..

Of all we’ve known

It's 9 o’clock and it’s getting dark and I can’t see the road
I flash my headlights into the dark night
I swear we’ll make it on our own

We're older than we used to be
this town holds no more to see
we’re fading in, we’re fading out
until I hear you say

Come on, come on
Hey kid, this is far too important for you to understand
She says be a man, you know this is what we both wanted
It’s time for us to let go
of all we’ve known

It’s 1 a.m. and we’re alone again, I reach out for the sky
My mind keeps playing all the words you’re saying
I’m always wrong when you are right

We re older than we used to be
This town holds no more to see
We’re fading in, we’re fading out until I hear you say

Come on, come on
Hey kid, this is far too important for you to understand
She says be a man, you know this is what we both wanted
It’s time for us to let go
of all we’ve known

Come on, come on
Hey kid, this is far too important for you to understand
She says be a man, you know this is what we both wanted
It’s time for us to let go
of all we’ve known

Of all we’ve known, of all we’ve known
Of all we’ve known (Hey kid, this is far to important)
Of all we’ve known (For you to understand)
She says be a man

ALL I EVER WANTED WAS YOUR LOVE!!!

Aku tak pernah mendapat sedikit sebanyak kasih sayang dari kau.
Dan kau juga tidak pernah memberiku kasih sayang yang sepenuhnya.

I never been loved or never felt the love from anyone.
Not even fatherly-love.
But maybe there's a lil bit of motherly-love ive received.
But that's not enough i guess.

I just want to be loved, or love someone, && feel the love from anyone.
I need someone to love and care for me now.
It doesn't matter whether it's brotherly-love or sisterly-love or friendly-love or even lovely- love.

ALL I EVER WANTED WAS YOUR LOVE!!!

YOU'RE SUCHA SUCKER FOR ME...

How i wish my life would have been great.
How i wish my house would be as comfortable, cozy and conducive as others.
How i wish i could have my own personal space and privacy.
How i wish i could make any decisions on my own and you would support them instead of going against them.
How i wish i could be like my other friends, in terms of everything, inc size.
How i wish i would be treated like an adult and not like some small kid who's still in primary school or something.
How i wish i could have more of my own freedom and not be held and controlled by you that much.
How i wish you could understand the new world today, where information technology, fashion and stuffs is the in-thing.
How i wish you would really understand me fully in every aspect of my growing life.
How i wish you would appreciate me more than just a useless child.
How i wish everything would be better than ever.
How i wish I've never met a father like you.
Actually i didn't want and ask much, but u made me do that.
You made me lose out to everyone in terms of almost everything and know, all i want is to gain it back!

Here's a letter to you, my emotion-less father, who don't know and don't even care about his son's own feelings.
All you care about is your own egoistic personification.
Thanks alot dad for bringing me up all this while.
I do appreciate that i guess.
But then you forget that you can't keep me with you forever and you need to let me go, to where the future is awaiting me and let me do things that i could benefit from.
I have my own brains and now that I'm older, i know how to think for myself, what's good, what's bad, what's right and what's wrong.

Dad your sucha sucka!, i cant really explain what type of person you are.
Because your odd, even mum said that.
You let others shatter in front of you and you wouldn't do anything about it.
You're so not open minded unlike other parents.
Yes there's time to be strict but you don't make any good to my life man.

Seriously.

I'm like this all this while too was all because of you.
Ive never known and met a dad like you man.
Kudos ah for hurting me and let me be EMO all this while and making me like your own pet, not beloved child.

CONGRATULATIONS ONCE AGAIN AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING, NEGATIVE, DAD!
i hate you so much that i wish i never born to be your son!

PS:actually i didnt mean anything about this post..wrote it on impulse w/o thinking.. sry if ive offended anyone. lols

Wetnessday!

It's raining outside now.
I can't go out and i don't want to too.
Coz there's nobody at home right now and im not being controlled.
Yay!:D
But i swear hols are soo boring though can be quite fun too as it supposed to be.
However im just slacking and rotting at home.
Waiting for jobs to call back.
Bt i doubt they will although yesterday me and 'Ammar went job hunting at Toa Payoh and Dhoby Ghaut there.
Both were retail assistant i think.
I don't even know the job i was applying for.

HAHA!

And it was dame funny when i told 'Ammar my IC lost.
We were at a 7-11 then and i was paying for my stuffs.
So 'Ammar tried to call the Kelly agency or sthg and reported that my IC was still with them.
Lo and behold when i was in the bus 80 home alone, i realized tt my IC sticked to the back of my wallet which was plastic-like material.
HAHAHA.
I was laughing to myself tt i think the ppl in the bus thought i was crazy.
LOL.
Thank god its not lost or i'll have to pay 100 bucks or sthg to make a new one as told by Hafiz who recently lost his IC.

HAHA!

OK.
It was quite fun going out with 'Ammar though i had to eat while walking to his house bustop.
We talked about clean stuffs not like some ppl who always talk dirty.
And it was quite weird too to be thrifty as we both were dead broke.
But still we managed to fill our stomachs with food. lol=p
All with the help of oni 2 bux and ez-link.
Yay!

HAHA!

So today they all were supposed to go to the WildWildWet at 9 i heard.
BUT it was raining so haha they still havent gone there yet.
I bet tk jadi.
Hehs.
I nvr go coz nobody invited and so yeah.
But i still need to go tho 4H class chalet later on at 5 i gez at downtown east too.
Haiya i feel lyk dun wanna go.
Lyk quite lazy ah.
Bt our dear Melon keep pestering me to go so yeah.
Must go i gez.
Bt muz bring 11 bux and 1.5 litres of bottle.
Where to gt those when i dont have any single cents.
NVM.
Worse comes to worse i can't go lorr.

Alright 12.30pm now and i wanna go eat my lunch though there's nthg at home for me to eat.
Must wait for my mum to come home maybe.
Or i juz use my dad's money first to go buy food.

OK BYE PPL.
CYA NXT TIME.

DECEMBER

Oh well.
i gez the year 2007 is just coming to an end..
one more month to go b4 2008 takes over.
such dramatic year with o lvls and many other stuffs..
haiz..
wished i could turn back time..
bt its the past now..
its hard to say goodbye when you've just said hello a few moments ago.
bt what to do..
life must go on..
n hawthorne heights lead guitarist died in his sleep last saturday 24.11.07.
its just so sad.
and i had gone through endless sufferings bt im thankful tt im still here..
nothing much to update coz my life's just the same old boring story..
dunno lar mayb im juz to lazy to write out all those things nwdays..
n itz 3.23 am nw.
im soo sleepy.
so yeah just stay tuned for my blog's great revival.
lol
nitez bye!